Author: jamaapoa
•Tuesday, January 23, 2007
i was listening to easy fm (former nation fm) breakfast show yesterday which is hosted by ciku – is she a former standard pulse magazine editor?. the budding show host has made a name for her show in the overcrowded breakfast show circuit through her popular calls that busts cheating spouses.

easy fm breakfast show is on the rise after a ride down the ratings when munene nyaga and ngatia left. sports newscaster bernard otieno didn’t do the show justice and talia tried. my 0.02$.

she initiated a discussion on why women snoop when they are left at jamaas homes. she admitted herself having snooped and found more than she bargained for and so did other calling listeners.

i had thought the problem is a reserve of certain persona non grata who are forever banned from setting foot in my place unaccompanied. this followed my discovery that whenever i left such persons alone in my place they had an uncontrollable curiosity to go through my stuff.

“you told me you were done with tracy, why do you still have her photos”, i was once confronted.

“why should i not, she is part of my past and we didn’t murder each other”, i answered back.

then something hit my mars brain hard.

“how did you know i still have them?” i inquisitively asked the venutian.

cunningly, she boomeranged the guilt on me.

“you still love her, you do not love me!”, she said amid sobs.

what logic! but it worked; calmed me down and love had to be affirmed.

“it’s not like that. you do know that i love and cherish you and no one has ever or will ever take your place in my heart” i assured and defended myself.

“really?”, she sought my genuine confirmation.

“yeah”, surely there can be no better answer to that.

i continued to justify retaining my x-file photos., “besides i think it’s a high school thing to poke on an ex’s eyes in a still photograph or cut them out in a group photo or burn them”

“then return them or else …” she said firmly and slyly while stroking my chest with her index finger.

before i could respond she walked away to the kitchen, a winner smile splashed over her pretty hideous face “where is the pizza you went to buy, i am feeling soo hungry”. i could not follow up on the evil of snooping. i felt like adam after swallowing the forbidden fruit from eve’s tender hands; cornered, won over and naked.

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11 comments:

On January 23, 2007 8:01 pm , Anonymous said...

Women do love to snoop coz information gives them power. I believe in if you cant avoid leaving your gal at home alone, is making sure that the evidence of your past is very well hidden; so well hidden that if found it warrants an explosion of anger on your part that makes her back track and also laying on the guilt card as fast as possible.
It is a hard one to play but it works.

 
On January 23, 2007 10:09 pm , AK said...

A woman has to know where she stands! and snooping is one way of knowin.

I did it once, well didn't mean to, but this half-open travel bag at the foot of bed caught my attention. and not just the bag, but the fact that there was a very newish, white, babycloth-lookin item slightly peeping out.

Hilarious! I opened it a bit more and it was a whole bag of new baby clothes. Now, what would my man be doing with all that?

A discovery like that has to be backed-up. I had to find more evidence. Looked for the diary. the one I had given him months earlier. Aki some men!

To cut the long story short, by the time he came from work, his house looked like a hurricane had passed by. I was shocked at my own level of rage.

He tried the guilt card- privacy clause and all that- didn't work. diary entries are hard to argue against.

JP, your post has taken me years back. sorry for blogging on yours!

 
On January 23, 2007 10:26 pm , Anonymous said...

Oh the wily ways of women. LOL. I am enjoying my singlehood a little too much am afraid. In a relatioship stuff from exes are always cause for contention. Out of sight and under lock and key, key stored out of the house! Easiest way is to hand it to your bro/pal/sis to hang onto it for you if you intend to keep it, otherwise its the rubbish tip for them.

 
On January 24, 2007 9:15 am , SisBigBones said...

I'm a pro at this behavior, but only with my current boyfriend. I used to frown at my friends whenever they confessed to snooping, but when I REALLY fell in love, it came naturally and I took it a step further (hilarious details on my blog). Personally, I became vulnerable and needed reassurance that this man was for real and I wasn't just another bootycall. What better way than to look for hard evidence? After all, if you're just starting to date, honesty and trust are questionable. Nevertheless, that behavior is long gone. Now that I'm content in the knowledge that he didn't lie and I'm the only woman in his life, I do not feel the urge to snoop around his house, phone, etc.

 
On January 24, 2007 9:41 am , akiey said...

As they say "When you work hard at looking for something, you will eventually find it"

Snooping women often do it with malice & those that come up with dirt can't live with it.

If someone's in the habit of snooping on me I will deliberately leave a trail of whatever it is they thought they'd come across. When "busted" I will gladly indicate the joke's on them,lol!

 
On January 24, 2007 10:13 am , Prousette said...

The only things I will go through and thoroughly if a martian left me at his place would be his books. Too bad if I come across a photo of the exes in there!

 
On January 25, 2007 2:52 am , mama shady said...

aaah!the truth will out. so be real, if you have pictures of the ex, why are you hiding them!? and if the chic you're dating cozes over them,then that means that you guys need to talk about where y'all stand in the relationship!if its issues of trust ama random insecurities ebu you talk about them now!these mambos of hiding and snooping...recipe for disaster!
tangent: personally im extremely curious.i hate being left in peoples rooms because i feel like a kid on some famous five mission to finding out more about them. i will want to look at their pictures and books, and things on their desk,...so ya, i just hate being left in peoples rooms.woi I've written a composition.pole

 
On January 31, 2007 3:36 pm , jamaapoa said...

@acolyte, learnt it the hard way but became more creative if i chance to leave one. like make sure things fall when they open wardrobes. have even toyed of having flour on crucial places for those 'i caught you' footprints or fingerprints.

@ak, wow! that was a piece n half. trying to imagine the look on his face when he got back. some things should just be laid bare from the start then pple decide which way to go.

@aegeus, hiding the key won't help, ladies have amazing sense of suspicion and the moment they set their minds on corroborating evidence, key or no key won't help. you will wonder whether they hired a tractor. the easiest way is to destroy the past.

i was surprised to hear on the said radio show a lady who had busted her cheating husband, call in the next day, saying that she has agreed to share the husband with the other lady as long as she was recognized as the first lady. the previous day, she was full of fire and brimstone, though most of it was directed to the other lady. some men have an amazing way of turning the game on the ladies when caught red handed with the hand in the cookie jar.

@sisbigbones, would you say that snooping is a sign of distrust or need for assurance? i tend to think that would debase the foundation of a relationship; that of trust. visited your blog, lovely posts.

@akiey, that would be fun depending on the risk u r willing to take. some may believe they actually busted you and you are acting jokey to cover up.

@prousette, lol, i thought you would go through his books to get to know his personality and likes. kumbe its the photos! thats academic snooping.

@mama shady, at times its not that u hide the ex's photos, you just feel there is no need to get rid of them. no harm in accepting the past. but then she views that as an active connection that threatens the present. as you say both should be trusting, that's what love is all about.

 
On January 31, 2007 6:39 pm , Petstan said...

Women shouldn't get away with the snooping. A man should let her know in no uncertain terms that the easiest way to piss him off is to rummage thru his stuff.
Their flimsy excuse about 'wanting to know their place in the liaison' is crap. No one knows what their partner is up to while they're not in your company/presence.
All the same, if someone can't trust their partner, they should just stay the hell away from affairs. Being single is REALLy stress-free, I tell you. We all know that trust is motivated by doubt and that liaisons are fickle.

 
On February 01, 2007 6:05 pm , jamaapoa said...

@peter, somehow they have a way of getting away with it. but agree with you they shouldn't and trust is paramount in a relationship.

 
On October 13, 2007 4:55 am , Anonymous said...

I am a fellow secret snooper - terrible I know - but I don't think it is as much YOU as it is HER. There is probably some terrible hurtful thing that happened to her in her past that makes it hard to trust that the past is really in the past for a guy she likes.

Don't be too hard on her. She probably feels guilty, but scared enough to bring up what she found.