Author: jamaapoa
•Tuesday, June 20, 2006
Honorable members, distinguished guests, Ladies and Gentlemen: Thank you for giving me this platform to not only share my experience but also to share in yours.

As a Kenyan woman and a woman living with AIDS, I treasure the leadership, expertise and wisdom of you to bring this prayer forum.

My presence here is not so much on expertise but more an indication and a symbolic of strides of healing and reconciliation that have taken place in the last couple of years. And for that I am grateful.

My only strength here is in fact also captured in my identity; that I am a woman, and a woman with AIDS. I have spent nineteen years living with the AIDS virus and all my time is committed to giving hope to those who have also been found by the virus no matter how helpless and hopeless sometimes it may look.

Some of what I have learnt on the road to AIDS is painful; stigma and discrimination are brutal and universal. Hypocrisy mars every level of government response to AIDS by pandering stigma and moral judgemetalism or rather playing the deaf to critical issues affecting lives of those who are HIV-infected.

Our leaders who are also power brokers can respond more readily to international declarations and commitments more than they will respond to the orphaned child’s cry at home.

I recognize that as people living with AIDS – PLWAs – we are branded by others more than we define ourselves. We are not seasoned fighters who know how to battle societal judgments.

When our leaders, preachers, teachers, etc tell us that AIDS is a dirty illness belonging to dirty people, we don’t want to be identified as infected.

We fear our families’ rejection and our communities’ isolation. Our fears keep us from being tested, stigmatization block us from seeking treatment and ultimately condemn us to a slow, painful and inevitable death.

What we, PLWAs, need most and most urgently is the redemption of our status as human beings, we need leaders to champion our cause until we gather enough courage and strength to champion it ourselves. We are desperate for leadership that will define us as human beings, valued and worth no matter our HIV status.

We are ordinary people in need of extraordinary leadership. We need leadership that will influence workplace policies and insurance policies and other practices that discriminate us day in day out. Leadership that will put policies in place that will protect our rights as human beings. We are not asking for extra favours. We don’t ask for special treatments or special considerations.

We need the voice of the Minister, the Bishop, the priest, and the MP; voices that we have not heard in the past, we are now increasingly desperate to hear passionate senior policy voice demanding AIDS to be a priority, and a priority now.

We need leaders to shake off the aura of “victims” as if we are feeble and passive objects. We want you to become powerful ambassadors for compassion and healing. We need your leadership to campaign for our dignity as much as crusade for interventions. It is dignity that inspires our courage and emboldens our self-esteem.

Dignity raises our faces that were lowered in shame. Dignity straightens our backs when they have been broken by stigma. And dignity strengthens our character when we have been assaulted.

Your language matters. It can be used to lift us or to demean us and break us. It you leaders tell us that we are dirty – we feel unworthy. If you tell us that we are societal problems, we feel guilty. If you tell us we are fallen, evil, useless, then we have ability to be people at all. The language of our leaders defines us in ways we cannot define ourselves.

Until you people of stature and leadership step up to lead this, as people living with HIV and AIDS, we will struggle and stammer with issues of powerlessness and futility.

But you can reason: “me I don’t even comment on people living with AIDS” as you do. Believe me you have, because silence is as potent as speech. If you have the power to lift us up and heal us but say nothing about us, we know by your silence that we are not worthy. Silence as well as speech can build our hope or break our will; lead us to service to bring us to suicide.

I am trying to calculate the impact we would make if the leaders in this room, we committed ourselves to embrace service instead of denial; to nurture and care for others including one another rather than seeking refuge in undeserved silence. Believe me; we could equip an army of compassion and healing whose ambition would be war against stigma, discrimination, ignorance and illness. We have the capacity to do this; we have the knowledge; we have the power and we have the influence if only we will use it.

And in the end, we people living with AIDS, we shall remember not the stigma and discriminating practices from the enemy but the deafening silence of our leaders.

Thank you ladies and gentlemen and may you all have a great day.

This speech was given by asunta wagura, the executive director of Kenya Network of Women living with Aids (KENWA) during the national prayer breakfast held on may 27 2006. It was touching, moving, inspiring, hope instilling and encouraging.Thanks Asunta for allowing me to share it with my readers. I wish you God's grace, enablement and strength to carry on with the noble work you are doing amongst us. You have moved me into action and will be contacting you regarding the same.
Author: jamaapoa
•Monday, June 19, 2006
last weekend i decided to cool my head at the coast. apparently this season, coast is cooler and wetter than the capital. that defies not only the norm but also the maxim of the higher you go the cooler it becomes. unlike the times when ‘watu wa bara’ are harassed by the coastal climate, during this time the weather is fantastic. i went to the heart of kaloleni division and encountered one of the nine kayas or mji of wachonyi, the better subtribe of the mijikenda tribe which has nine subtribes. i was nowhere near civilization and i had to keep reminding myself that i am still in kenya. i think what i went through would rate highly in the survivor series. i will tackle one in this post, the others later.

i did experience a lot of interesting stuff but what baffled me most were the stories about witchcraft. this subtribe is the guru of these mystic games and some of the tales i heard could not be classified by my mind as anything near reality. however the locals hold them yours truly and their lives are guided and governed by the fear of the same. while their wagiriama cousins are busy seeking after the political kingdom, the wachonyi are content with their supernatural pursuits.

whenever i heard of the man-eaters of tsavo before, i would think of the lions that used to maul railway construction workers and traders in the early 1900s. now that will also be a passphrase for another kind of man-eaters; cannibals at the coast. i have always thought that in kenya we have only one cannibalistic grouping somewhere in the rift valley, maybe rumours, but there seems to be another one. in the heart of the subtribe is a grouping called ‘watu wa chama’. they are believed to have the real mizimu powers and a host of jinis at their beckon and call to terrorize any enemies. they believe in human sacrifice. human flesh is provided by new converts who sacrifice their closest relatives in order to join and sustain membership. the more human blood you provide the more you rise in the rank and file of the group. they have a huge appetite for more ‘developed villagers’ blood and the more you grow in wealth, the more you are required to sacrifice for protection. i was told that this is one of the reasons that make the area largely undeveloped.

once a target sacrifice dies of mysterious circumstances and is buried a ritual is carried in the evening of the burial to recover the body. senior members of the group approach the grave naked and in reverse gear chanting. they ‘knock’ on the grave and the body pops up, no exhuming! the body is later carried and hung inside a store which is strategically positioned above the fireplace in the way of the billowing smoke. smoke is a good preservative of meat.

usually the delicacy is eaten gradually with time as all and sundry enjoy a good serving of the local brew mnazi. mnazi is tapped skillfully from the coconut tree and later fermented. and here lies the trap for unsuspecting mnazi clients. the local mnazi brew den may not be serving chicken or goat meat but human flesh peddled as genuine meat. once an unsuspecting person takes that meat, you are already initiated to be a mtu wa chama. that same night, the jinis will visit you and require you to sacrifice someone close for you are already a member. for such, the jinis thirst for human blood is insatiable and they ask and ask and ask till you have given them your whole family. many locals are unable to handle the torture and they end up committing suicide.
Author: jamaapoa
•Friday, June 16, 2006
listening to the finance minister reading the budget yesterday a sense of thrill, hope and patriotism bubbled inside of me. beyond his eloquence, posture and cuteness lay strong communiqué of hope and goodwill for our beloved motherland. i was impressed and proud of a former chairman of a prominent institute i subscribe to (i.e. icpak), just as i am proud of michael waweru of the kenya revenue authority. it also reminded me that in our country we got thinkers; creative and innovative servants who are ready to think outside the box if there is political goodwill and commitment. the execution of those wonderful proposals is another issue altogether but what we had yesterday is a good step in the right direction.

good work amos: just like the biblical amos, you’ve become a prophet of hope and restoration as you lay the cornerstone of our building blocks for growth and prosperity. i pray you will not burst my bubble like the way your colleagues burst the narc dream and wiped from our skies the rainbow vision. i hope you were not fuelling my day dreams with all those great plans for infrastructural development. just like the cdf, latf and hiv constituency funds, i laud the kshs 11 million per constituency for building roads, the revamping of 210 village polytechnics, the introduction of turnover tax and the advent of infrastructure bonds in our capital markets. i wish it will not turn out that you helped me build castles in the air when your hawk-eyed political opponents unearth anglo-leasing financing shady deals when they scrutinize your budgetary provisions later. but listening to you last evening on NTV’s ‘on the spot’ with julie gichuru, i am convinced you mean and will act well and i believe you for now.

thank you for seeking to reward philanthropy and corporate social responsibility via making tax deductible expense of the same. i am sure the likes of safaricom, bamburi cement, athi river mining, shell, magadi soda, eabl and a host of other corporate giants are clapping, so are we noble good hearted kenyans. pushing kenya towards budget financing independence is a giant leap towards liberation from neo-colonialism. a host of other good things you said are worthwhile and if your government just does the roads comprehensively i can assure you of my vote in the coming elections regardless of what orange and kanu tells me. if you fail on this one the converse will be true no matter what else you do.

nevertheless, the increase of kshs 3.20 per litre on the fuel levy was too theoretical and the practical implications may surmount the convenience of scrapping road licenses in the short term. we, the common wananchi may suffer irredeemably. but if you make all those other niceties you uttered come to life, i will promise you one thing. i will more than gladly dig my pocket deeper through increased transport costs and incidental price increases related to higher fuel costs to finance the public kitty. this i will do, although i already give you 30 per cent of my income every month. woe unto me if you don’t bring to life your sweet words. for i will be a twice beaten, thrice shy disillusioned kenyan and i will dissociate from you and your ilk then.